Sunday, March 13, 2005

allieplusopenbarequalstrouble

Dear DP,
I'm sorry that I bit you. I haven't done that since college. Back then, it was a loving gesture between friends -comparable to the nuzzle or a peck on the side of the neck. I really thought I outgrew biting years ago, so for your own good please discourage me in the future if I challenge you to a kegstand or request to shoot the boot. Again, I am truly sorry and hope that I didn't leave a mark. I know sometimes those bitches can hurt.

Dear guy that Ands made me pose with for a polaroid picture,
I distinctly remember Waller urging us to pretend we knew each other. What can I say...I'm not an actress, but I will ham it up for one of Ands' polaroids (exhibit A: Halloween 2004). I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong idea. I don't even know your name.

Dear JS,
I held your face and kissed you. Chastely. In front of other people. Because somebody ought to. I'm not even going to pretend that I'm sorry about that.
P.S. - You have really soft lips. Keep doing whatever maintenance you're doing.



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