Thursday, April 07, 2005

scale of intoxication

2 plastic cups of white wine: "Hey, that guy over there looks just like Brian Austin Green."
1/2 sour apple martini: "Dude. That IS Brian Austin Green."
1 sour apple martini: "Excuse me, Brian Austin Green, as I squeeze past you to get to the bathroom."
2 sour apple martinis: "Who is that dashing young man in the crisp white shirt? Oh. It's Brian Austin Green."
3 sour apple martinis: "I'm TOTALLY going to makeout with Brian Austin Green!"
4 sour apple martinis: "My mom's gonna love Brian Austin Green."



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